Spring Break
Sass Attack!
Suzette De La Cré
Issue date: 5/29/09 Section: Arts & Entertainment
Do you ever feel lost? Like you're not sure which direction to take in life? Let's face it - sometimes we need help navigating this crazy thing called college. That's why I'm here. Consider me your third-party, impartial columnist. You have questions, and baby doll, I've got your answers. Or rather, I can provide my spin on things. So sit on down and buckle up, 'cause you're in for a big ol' Sass Attack!
If y'all are finding yourself in a hardship, seek me out at entertainment@thetriangle.org. Make sure to put "ADVICE" in the subject line. I got your back, sugar.
I'm afraid that I'm going to be a virgin forever. What can I do to get laid?
As odd as it might sound, I happen to be at a bar recently talking to a 29-year-old virgin. When asked the reason for remaining pure all these years, he said numerous reasons. The one that stood out was that he hadn't met anyone yet really worth losing it with. That is a horrifying thought, that someone has not met someone even remotely special in almost three decades. By the way, he was very attractive.
Sorry if that horrifies you. The truth is, sometimes people just don't have sex, whatever the reason. If you in fact want to get laid, your best bet is to diagnose why you have yet to get sex and fix the issue. Stop by my office sometime and we'll talk more.
In the meantime, here is what I'm going to suggest. I would ignore Craigslist invites (and most invites online), newspaper ads, hookers and mail order brides. Ok, so they are options, but really is that the first time story you want to tell?
I would suggest going out to your favorite bar and really put yourself out there. Dance with some girls you are interested in and that may return said interest. Also, ask friends if they know any cute girls that may be interested. Ok, so these lean toward finding a girlfriend and not just a one-night-stand - but one can sometimes lead to the other and vice versa. Suzette has spoken.
My boyfriend's ex just sent me an e-mail saying she knows where I live, who I am and what I drive. I'm kind of scared. What should I do?
If y'all are finding yourself in a hardship, seek me out at entertainment@thetriangle.org. Make sure to put "ADVICE" in the subject line. I got your back, sugar.
I'm afraid that I'm going to be a virgin forever. What can I do to get laid?
As odd as it might sound, I happen to be at a bar recently talking to a 29-year-old virgin. When asked the reason for remaining pure all these years, he said numerous reasons. The one that stood out was that he hadn't met anyone yet really worth losing it with. That is a horrifying thought, that someone has not met someone even remotely special in almost three decades. By the way, he was very attractive.
Sorry if that horrifies you. The truth is, sometimes people just don't have sex, whatever the reason. If you in fact want to get laid, your best bet is to diagnose why you have yet to get sex and fix the issue. Stop by my office sometime and we'll talk more.
In the meantime, here is what I'm going to suggest. I would ignore Craigslist invites (and most invites online), newspaper ads, hookers and mail order brides. Ok, so they are options, but really is that the first time story you want to tell?
I would suggest going out to your favorite bar and really put yourself out there. Dance with some girls you are interested in and that may return said interest. Also, ask friends if they know any cute girls that may be interested. Ok, so these lean toward finding a girlfriend and not just a one-night-stand - but one can sometimes lead to the other and vice versa. Suzette has spoken.
My boyfriend's ex just sent me an e-mail saying she knows where I live, who I am and what I drive. I'm kind of scared. What should I do?
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