Sass Attack!
Suzette De La Cré
Issue date: 10/17/08 Section: Arts & Entertainment
Do you ever feel lost? Like you're not sure which direction to take in life? Let's face it-sometimes we need help navigating this crazy thing called college. That's why I'm here. Consider me your third party, impartial columnist. You have questions, and baby doll, I've got your answers. Or rather, I can provide my spin on things. So sit on down and buckle up, 'cause you're in for a big ol' Sass Attack!
If y'all finding yourself in a hardship, seek me out at entertainment@thetriangle.org. Make sure to put "ADVICE" in the subject line. I got your back, sugar.
I just found out that my boyfriend cheated on me. How should I take revenge?
Let's face it girls, guys cheat. It's not their fault, though. Men, especially college-aged ones, are sometimes stupid. They let that little limb take control and make a bad choice. Sometimes it is forgivable-as long as you're happy being his doormat. However, it is quite obvious that you are not overlooking his error.
So let's see: you could spread rumors, telling people that he has herpes or maybe poison his dinner with saltpeter or horse laxatives? These are all wonderfully malicious ideas, yet might I suggest another tactic? Of course I can-this is my column.
Forget the shmuck. He's not worth your time. Move on, find a new hunk-one who will respect you and treat you like the Cleopatra you are. And if you are still feeling sore, just remember, karma's a bitch. He'll get his in the end. The queen has spoken!
How do I overcome the horrible post-Handschumacher Dining Hall experience?
Oh, that brings back memories. After 30 weeks of Handschumacher, you'll get three lovely months of home cooked meals. That is, you will spend your freshman summer at home and that someone at home can cook-not always a given. Fall will return and it's back to Philly.
This city is famous for its food, so you are in luck. Let's say you are on a budget. I'm going to suggest you learn some quick simple meals and get acquainted with any of the grocers or food markets. But if cooking just ain't your style and you have the financial backing, there are a plethora of yummies around town.
If y'all finding yourself in a hardship, seek me out at entertainment@thetriangle.org. Make sure to put "ADVICE" in the subject line. I got your back, sugar.
I just found out that my boyfriend cheated on me. How should I take revenge?
Let's face it girls, guys cheat. It's not their fault, though. Men, especially college-aged ones, are sometimes stupid. They let that little limb take control and make a bad choice. Sometimes it is forgivable-as long as you're happy being his doormat. However, it is quite obvious that you are not overlooking his error.
So let's see: you could spread rumors, telling people that he has herpes or maybe poison his dinner with saltpeter or horse laxatives? These are all wonderfully malicious ideas, yet might I suggest another tactic? Of course I can-this is my column.
Forget the shmuck. He's not worth your time. Move on, find a new hunk-one who will respect you and treat you like the Cleopatra you are. And if you are still feeling sore, just remember, karma's a bitch. He'll get his in the end. The queen has spoken!
How do I overcome the horrible post-Handschumacher Dining Hall experience?
Oh, that brings back memories. After 30 weeks of Handschumacher, you'll get three lovely months of home cooked meals. That is, you will spend your freshman summer at home and that someone at home can cook-not always a given. Fall will return and it's back to Philly.
This city is famous for its food, so you are in luck. Let's say you are on a budget. I'm going to suggest you learn some quick simple meals and get acquainted with any of the grocers or food markets. But if cooking just ain't your style and you have the financial backing, there are a plethora of yummies around town.
Be the first to comment on this story