Ask Andy
By: Andy Kabel
Issue date: 6/1/07 Section: Ed-Op
Originally published: 6/1/07 at 3:36 AM EST
Last update: 6/1/07 at 3:36 AM EST
Originally published: 6/1/07 at 3:36 AM EST
Last update: 6/1/07 at 3:36 AM EST
Bad Mornings
Andy,
I just can't seem to wake up in the morning. I get the appropriate amount of sleep (seven to eight hours), but I never have any energy. I don't like coffee, so do you have any other energy-inducing suggestions?
-Marcus
Have you considered joining our brethren of the night and becoming a nocturnal being? You can't go wrong hunting your neighbor's dog for sustenance while it "accidentally" urinates on your lawn. Unless your neighbor catches you in the process and threatens you with mace until you take your plastic fangs out.
-Andy
Sweaty Girl
Andy,
I sweat. A lot. I sweat in warm temperatures, like normal people, but I also sweat in cold temperatures. I have a prescription antiperspirant, but it does seemingly nothing. What can I do?
-Karen
Changing yourself to fit in with society is so blasé. It's about time society changed to work around you. Take the way things happen now as an example and you could start the next best trend on the street. Or you could end up smelling bad and looking like you smell even worse in the process. A world of choices!
-Andy
The Filming Fakeout
Andy,
I met this guy who said he's a film student and wanted to put me in one of his movies. But when I showed up at his apartment, he didn't really seem to have any equipment other than what looked like an outdated Web cam. I saw a show Tyra Banks did once on a similar situation and she said leave, so I did, citing "feminine problems." Did I make the right decision, or am I just being too uptight?
-Jane
Jane, you were at the auditions for Dora the Explorer Live as well?
-Andy
Swollen Foot
Andy,
I got this bug bite on my foot. It's since grown into this massive purple/pink splotch. It's itchy and swollen. I think it's infected. What should I do?
-Dan
Are you sure it's a bug bite, Dan? Are you sure it's on your foot? Why don't you come back and talk when you are ready to face the truth and deal with your cold sores. Denial is not just a river in Egypt, Dan, as much as you might think so.
Andy,
I just can't seem to wake up in the morning. I get the appropriate amount of sleep (seven to eight hours), but I never have any energy. I don't like coffee, so do you have any other energy-inducing suggestions?
-Marcus
Have you considered joining our brethren of the night and becoming a nocturnal being? You can't go wrong hunting your neighbor's dog for sustenance while it "accidentally" urinates on your lawn. Unless your neighbor catches you in the process and threatens you with mace until you take your plastic fangs out.
-Andy
Sweaty Girl
Andy,
I sweat. A lot. I sweat in warm temperatures, like normal people, but I also sweat in cold temperatures. I have a prescription antiperspirant, but it does seemingly nothing. What can I do?
-Karen
Changing yourself to fit in with society is so blasé. It's about time society changed to work around you. Take the way things happen now as an example and you could start the next best trend on the street. Or you could end up smelling bad and looking like you smell even worse in the process. A world of choices!
-Andy
The Filming Fakeout
Andy,
I met this guy who said he's a film student and wanted to put me in one of his movies. But when I showed up at his apartment, he didn't really seem to have any equipment other than what looked like an outdated Web cam. I saw a show Tyra Banks did once on a similar situation and she said leave, so I did, citing "feminine problems." Did I make the right decision, or am I just being too uptight?
-Jane
Jane, you were at the auditions for Dora the Explorer Live as well?
-Andy
Swollen Foot
Andy,
I got this bug bite on my foot. It's since grown into this massive purple/pink splotch. It's itchy and swollen. I think it's infected. What should I do?
-Dan
Are you sure it's a bug bite, Dan? Are you sure it's on your foot? Why don't you come back and talk when you are ready to face the truth and deal with your cold sores. Denial is not just a river in Egypt, Dan, as much as you might think so.


