Spring Break
Let's Ask Andy
-email all questions to AskAndy@thetriangle.org-
By: Andy Kabel
Issue date: 5/11/07 Section: Ed-Op
Originally published: 5/11/07 at 3:06 AM EST
Last update: 5/12/07 at 10:45 AM EST
Originally published: 5/11/07 at 3:06 AM EST
Last update: 5/12/07 at 10:45 AM EST
Messy Roommate
Dear Andy,
My roommate keeps his side of the room extremely messy. This has created a constant problem when I try to bring home members of the opposite sex. How can I eliminate this problem?
Situations like this can be hard to deal with, as bringing up the subject is never easy. Try to talk about this problem with your roommate first. If he does not want to talk about it, throw your clothes on the floor too. Then, when he asks you where his new pair of Calvin Klein briefs is, you can pull down your own shorts and show him.
-Andy
No-Op
Dear Andy,
I'm a business major, and I don't have a co-op lined up yet. My cycle is quickly approaching, and I know that this is a really important time. Do you have any advice for what I could do?
Well, in my experience, co-op is mostly just an underplayed and worthless technicality. I say go for the big time. Have you considered dropping out of school and perhaps starting a pyramid scheme? If you do your research, and make sure your product is at least semi-realistic, you are as good as gold. Until you get arrested.
-Andy
Boyfriend Breakup
Dear Andy,
Next week I have Mid-terms, and this week I broke up with my boyfriend. Nothing seems to be going right. What can I do?
There are lots of things you can do, but you are at an extremely fragile point in your life. My recommendation would be to go out and pick up a copy of the largest and most expensive celebrity gossip magazine you can find. Then, read and memorize other people's problems, and you'll soon find that there are more important things going on in the world than your breakup. Like up skirt photographs. Or how to maintain that "genocidal refugee" look that so many actresses are sporting these days.
-Andy
Mystery Sneakers
Dear Andy,
Recently, on my walk home from class, I found some sneakers by the side of the road. I'm a "you only live once" sort of person, so I decided to take them for a stroll. Out of luck, the sneakers seem to be a perfect fit, however, I am curious as to whether I should continue wearing them, purely out of hygienic concern.
Dear Andy,
My roommate keeps his side of the room extremely messy. This has created a constant problem when I try to bring home members of the opposite sex. How can I eliminate this problem?
Situations like this can be hard to deal with, as bringing up the subject is never easy. Try to talk about this problem with your roommate first. If he does not want to talk about it, throw your clothes on the floor too. Then, when he asks you where his new pair of Calvin Klein briefs is, you can pull down your own shorts and show him.
-Andy
No-Op
Dear Andy,
I'm a business major, and I don't have a co-op lined up yet. My cycle is quickly approaching, and I know that this is a really important time. Do you have any advice for what I could do?
Well, in my experience, co-op is mostly just an underplayed and worthless technicality. I say go for the big time. Have you considered dropping out of school and perhaps starting a pyramid scheme? If you do your research, and make sure your product is at least semi-realistic, you are as good as gold. Until you get arrested.
-Andy
Boyfriend Breakup
Dear Andy,
Next week I have Mid-terms, and this week I broke up with my boyfriend. Nothing seems to be going right. What can I do?
There are lots of things you can do, but you are at an extremely fragile point in your life. My recommendation would be to go out and pick up a copy of the largest and most expensive celebrity gossip magazine you can find. Then, read and memorize other people's problems, and you'll soon find that there are more important things going on in the world than your breakup. Like up skirt photographs. Or how to maintain that "genocidal refugee" look that so many actresses are sporting these days.
-Andy
Mystery Sneakers
Dear Andy,
Recently, on my walk home from class, I found some sneakers by the side of the road. I'm a "you only live once" sort of person, so I decided to take them for a stroll. Out of luck, the sneakers seem to be a perfect fit, however, I am curious as to whether I should continue wearing them, purely out of hygienic concern.
Andy
posted 5/11/07 @ 10:59 AM EST
This is the dumbest fucking thing I have ever seen.